Is earned by learning Jesus’ prayer on the cross:
Jesus said, “Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing.” And they divided up his clothes by casting lots.
Luke 23:34
It’s one thing to forgive someone when they apologize. It’s another thing to forgive someone when they sort of realize what they’ve done, even if not fully. It’s another thing to forgive someone in their ignorance. When they’re clueless. When they’ll never hear me. When they’ll never understand the gravity of their sin. When they basically ignore what I just said and go right on casting lots for my clothes.
In holding the other captive, I hold myself captive. Forgiveness is all about freedom: setting the other free from the burden of guilt, and thus setting myself free from the ongoing effects of their sin against me. Not because they deserve the freedom by their merits, but because I deserve the freedom by Jesus’ merits.
If I only forgive when someone is adequately repentant by my standards, I hold them captive until I have made them learn some lesson. I make myself the judge and jury instead of remaining in my rightful place as the plaintiff. Forgiveness is all about humbly accepting my place as the plaintiff, trusting in the Great Judge. Like Jesus did on the cross.
