Confession is Communal
This past week, on Ash Wednesday, our morning Bible study just happened to center us on this verse from John’s first letter:
If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.
—1 John 1:9
While completely unplanned, this verse served as a timely introduction to Lent, the 40 days in which Christians prepare for Easter by engaging in the spiritual practices of fasting and repentance—which, whether we use the word or not, entails confession. Much of our discussion of 1 John 1:9 centered on each of us acknowledge our own sins and then confessing them to God. Great conversation!
I often think it’s helpful to take some words out of a strictly religious context in order to better understand them within a religious context. So let’s momentarily get out of our minds “confessing our sins to God,” as in a private time of prayer. Let’s also get out of our minds any images of confessing to a priest—whether that practice falls within your experience or tradition or not. Removed from any formal religious language or setting, what then does “confession” mean?
I suggest this simple definition: public admission of wrongdoing.
Note the two elements: admission of wrongdoing (“I did something wrong”) and public (saying “I did something wrong” in presence of other people). Such a definition works in courtroom, a classroom, around a dinner table, or from a pulpit. This public or communal element is crucial to true Christian confession. It is undeniable that this was what John’s mind as he exhorted us believers to “confess our sins.”
Consider: First, the word for “confession” that he uses here, homologeo, is a compound word made up of the words for “together” and “speech”—saying things out loud together. Second, every single one of the nine verses in Chapter 1 has at least one explicit mentions of “we” or “us” or an otherwise plural phrase. Third, those communal words occur a total of 30—that’s thirty!—times. Again, in only nine verses.
No self-talk here. No private prayer. No hint of individualism. This confession is done together. So is the forgiveness and cleansing that God enacts in response.
All that is to say this: Confession is essential for the health of any organization. When I read in John 1 that the result of our confession is forgiveness and God cleansing us “from all unrighteousness,” I read that as God making us collectively healthy and whole. If admission of and accountability for wrongdoing is repressed or avoided, that is, well, decidedly unhealthy. Not to mention unchristian. Confessional communities become healthy communities.
Confession is Relational
So there’s a little Bible for you. However, confession does not hold the cleansing power that it does in our communities simply because “the Bible says so.” Rather, I believe it’s powerful because of the way God has wired us as relational beings. Consider, in the following three contexts, how damaging the opposite of confession can be—concealment, denial, and scapegoating.
In a marriage, a community of two, what if one person is willing to acknowledge their sin and confess it, but the other person tries to conceal wrongdoing, denies any accusations that may be brought up, and scapegoats blame onto their partner? Not a healthy dynamic. No marriage can sustain this for the long haul.
In family, a slightly larger community, what if only half of the people acknowledge their sin and confess it, but the other half conceal, deny, and scapegoat? What if only the mother and son are humble and repentant, but the father and daughter are not? Also not a very healthy environment. Whatever the size of the community, I think it’s safe to assume that the more people willing to confess their sins, the healthier the family will be. And, of course, the fewer who are willing to do so, the more unhealthy the family will be.
One more environment to consider: a church staff. Perhaps one that is double the size of the family mentioned above. What if four of the eight staff members are humble and are quick to confess their sins and ask for repentance? What about six out of eight? What about a dismal two out of eight? The more individuals who are humble and practice confession, the better.
However, just as in a family where the parents hold more power, those in positions of authority carry greater weight in the health of the organization, whether for good or for ill. I once had a boss who had a really hard time humbly acknowledging any wrongdoing. For example, one time, out of anger, he berated me and the work I was doing in a shockingly disrespectful and hurtful way. He pulled out negative and degrading assessments of me and my work that he had apparently been holding in for some time. Low blow after low blow. It left me reeling. I had never had a superior talk to me the way that he talked to me. (Thanks mom and dad, for never ever doing that to me!) For over a week I waited to see if my boss might apologize, but he did not (concealment). When I finally addressed it a week later, hoping for an apology, he tried to justify the way that he had spoken to me, reluctant to admit any wrongdoing (denial). He then later tried to pin his anger and outburst on me, erroneously telling others that I had yelled at him first (scapegoating).
Just last week I was directed to a church training called “Spiritual Abuse Prevention Training and Soul Care.” It’s fantastic! If you are in a position of church leadership, or have influence with anyone else who is, I highly recommend this video. It’s a great starting point for any church. Also, if you want to find a healthy church, anywhere that’s doing anything like this gets a gold star IMHO.
In the training, Chuck DeGroat lists thirteen manifestations of spiritual abuse.
One of these manifestations is “enforced accountability,” which is often means high accountability for others, but zero or low accountability for those in power. A mark of spiritual abuse is when there are inequitable standards for accountability, confession, and apology. Having been made to offer apologies to others myself at the direction of this very same boss who had a hard time apologizing, this one resonated deeply with me. (Not to mention seven other manifestations out of the thirteen. No small potatoes).
“With great power comes great responsibility.”
—Uncle Ben
How those in power practice humility, demonstrated in confession of wrongdoing and genuine apology, sets the tone for the community.
Confession is Healing
Confession is healing to the confessor. To the wronged. To the whole community. The wholeness and health that extend from one apology, from one expression of forgiveness, go far deeper and wider than we might think. This, I suspect, is where God’s grace reaches beyond even our own confessions. By saying that God will “forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness,” I suspect that John is saying, “He will forgive you for the things that you’re aware of, and even cleanse you from those wrongs of which you are ignorant. ‘All’ means ‘all.’”
This is how Lent can help your organization become more healthy.
Lent is an invitation to repent and confess. To own up to the wrongs we have done, and how those have affected our community—whether intentional or not, whether we’re aware of all the secondary effects or not. It’s an invitation to apologize whenever, wherever, and to whomever we need to.
Thus, Lent is also an opportunity for our community to be cleansed “from all unrighteousness.” For God to prove himself as being “faithful and just”, and for us to experience that life of freedom and wholeness and health.
Together.