Read the Comments

June 5, 2025

4 Min Read

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Last weekend I shared a post on Facebook of podcast episode that addresses the reporting mechanism that our previous denomination had set up. I shared the post, along with a very succinct summary of my subpar experience with the process (which I also left as a comment on the original podcast post), because I believe it’s important to hear whether or not such systems are working as they intend to. If the survivors of abuse who attempt to pursue resolution through any given organizational process are not listened to as litmus tests, who, then, is determining effectiveness?

The specifics of my experience is not what I want to get into here. That’s just the backdrop. What I want to bring up now is what happened to the comments section after my post: Two people responded with comments that were shockingly mean, attacking both me and my wife, making assumptions about our hearts, painting as the bad guys. The first of these people to go on the attack was a staff pastor. The second person is a church member who is also a relative of the aforementioned staff pastor.

Not only were me and my wife attacked, but when others who know us very well came to our defense in the comments, they were also attacked, belittled, criticized, and called names. Nastiness on top of nastiness.

Ugh. Moving on…

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Fits and Starts are the Formula

May 29, 2025

4 Min Read

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This past Sunday, one of the most encouraging long-time members of our church asked me, “So, Pastor of Revitalization, how’s the revitalization going?”

“In fits and starts,” I replied.

That was, of course, not the answer I wanted to give. Not the story my ego wanted to tell. But it was true. Left to my own egoic devices, my preference is zero to 60 in 6 seconds. A total 180. Burn it all down and start from scratch.

Over the years, mostly through failures and missteps, I’ve learned that such an approach doesn’t tend to work out so well. For several reasons: A) It’s not kind to others involved. Most people are not early adopters. Most need adequate to time to get onboard. B) It’s not speed that guarantees healthy change. After all, cancer cells can tend to grow pretty quickly. Impatience is not an asset. And, C) It’s not realistic in most cases. Real change must occur in reality—where humans actually live.

My role is not is not to simply be a leader who causes change, but to be a pastor who shepherds change to be as kind, patient, and realistic as possible.

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Silence Will Set You Free

May 26, 2025

3 Min Read

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Silence will set you free.

So quiet up, and listen down. Nope. Scratch that, reverse it.

—Willy Wonka

Jesus, scratching and reversing:

“And you will know the truth. and the truth will set you free.”

—John 8:32

This “knowing” that Jesus talks about is not merely intellectual, this is a whole-being “knowing.” It’s the same word that the Bible uses when talking about sex: Two people knowing each other is different than two people KNOWING each other. You get what I mean. So you can get what Jesus means: Knowing the truth is different than KNOWING the truth.

Jesus is not that interested in knowledge that is all in your head. It’s not about whether the right data has been downloaded into your brain. This is not the Matrix. You are not a computer. You are a human being with a body that is capable of knowing in more ways than one.

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We Can Remain Hidden or We Can Be Healed

May 24, 2025

5 Min Read

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It always starts small: A glance. A whisper. A passive-aggressive cut. A secret conversation. A decision made behind closed doors.

Jesus calls it “leaven”—that slow, quiet spread of something seemingly innocuous that changes the whole batch. He brings this up, according to Luke 12, to the crowds now, not just the disciples. He’s talking to all of us. Jesus isn’t warning us about the occasional act of hypocrisy. He’s not just pointing out a bad personal habit; he’s calling out a shared culture—a system propped up by appearances and protected by power.

The kind of culture that rewards those who know how to smile through gritted teeth. The kind that trains its leaders to never let their guard down. The kind where you learn to play the part, not confess your heart. The kind of culture where if you see something, you say nothing.

You can smell it in the air, can’t you? When a church becomes more about managing image than embodying grace, the soul starts to sour. It’s subtle. Just a pinch. But over time, it works through the whole loaf.

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May the Odds Be Never in Our Favor

May 21, 2025

2 Min Read

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When you’re outnumbered, when it seems as though the culture has outpaced you, when the neighborhood no longer recognizes your building as a holy place, when you feel like the only one left who still shows up, when the odds are against you—don’t panic.

Don’t let the empty pews do all the talking. Don’t let the numbers preach louder than the Gospel. Don’t let the cynical naysayers dominate the narrative. Don’t let fear have the microphone. Because that’s not the whole story.

This isn’t about battles with chariots and horses. It’s about all the quiet ways we feel overwhelmed: a neighborhood that’s moved on, a mission that feels like it’s run out of momentum, a church wondering if it still matters.

But right in the middle of the fear, God speaks. Not with shame. Not with a strategy. But with presence: “Don’t be afraid. Don’t panic. Don’t give up. I’m going with you.”

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What Was, What Is, and What Is Possible

May 17, 2025

3 Min Read

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Some people fix their attention on what was: The way this church used to be. The way our old church used to be. The way our grandparents’ church used to be. These folks quickly grow discontent. The church that is can never compare to the church that was. The folks are not much fun to be around.

Some people fix their attention on what is: What is “good” or “bad” today. What I’m “getting out of” church today. These folks remain unrooted, uncommitted, and unable to simply settle down and relax. Particularly when something gets uncomfortable, they run off to whatever else, or where ever else, or whoever else that they find novel. Such people often find themselves alone without stable rhythms or community.

Some people fix their attention on the future: What could be, whether good or bad. The future can seem so exciting precisely because it’s all in our heads. Pure imagination. But—spoilers!—no one really knows a dang thing about tomorrow. In full disclosure, this is where I tend to live, and it causes me to both forget the past and to be out of touch with what’s going on with the people right in front my face.

The trick, I suspect, is to learn how to learn at the center of the Venn diagram where the past, present, and future overlap. To not be overly enamored by one, nor to be overly averse to another.

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A Playground Parable

May 10, 2025

6 Min Read

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Once there was a young boy named Jimmy who was frequently put down and pushed around by a classmate named Max. Max was a popular kid. Super cool. Everybody seemed to like him—except for those who somehow got on his bad side. Day after day, Jimmy tried to just put up with the bullying. He’d tell himself, “It’s no big deal.” But one day it became a big deal. Max seriously crossed the line, hurting Jimmy so badly that he reported it. The Assistant Principal, Mr. Thompson, called Max into his office, along with Max’s best friend, Carl, who was in a different class and hadn’t seen the incidents. After their meeting, Mr. Thompson decided that Jimmy’s story didn’t hold up. Max and his friend both claimed that Jimmy was just overreacting and making things up. They even blamed Jimmy as the real problem, saying he was so hard to get along with. The letter Mr. Thompson sent home to Jimmy’s folks said that “it does not seem like Jimmy’s accusations are accurate.”

I told this little parable to my 6th-grade daughter one morning as we walked to school. I ended by asking her, “What do you think of that?”

She replied with one word: “Poop.” (Not edited—that’s literally how she talks. I’m welcoming her innocence as long as it lasts!)

“What do you mean by that?” I asked.

“Well, the Assistant Principal should have interviewed more kids from the class. Those who really knew what was going on. Who had seen stuff. That wasn’t fair!”

Simple enough for a 12-year-old to understand.

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An Apologetic Church

April 5, 2025

5 Min Read

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No, I’m not talking about apologetics, that formal defense or justification of a theory or religious doctrine. In general, my take is that Christian apologetics is largely a waste of time for two reasons.

One, it’s really just arguing. Trying to prove that I’m right and you’re wrong. Because the quickest path to the winners podium is to paint you as a loser. This does no favors to the good news of Jesus. I’ve never met anyone who was argued into faith. But maybe I’m hanging out with the wrong people.

Two, by using the word apologetic so often in this sense (defensively arguing), we lose the power of the other meaning: regretfully acknowledging an offense or failure. I’ve heard the word apologetic used far more in the church to describe defensive argument than I have to describe regretful sorrow. Heck, you can even get your PhD in defensive argument in order to defend the Christian faith, but I’m unaware of any such degree in saying “I’m sorry.”

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Desolate or Daring?

March 26, 2025

3 Min Read

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The following is an article I wrote or our church’s monthly newsletter. It is a condensed version of my most recent sermon by the same name. While originated as a word for our local congregation, perhaps it will speak to others as well—particularly if your church, like ours is struggling, desperately in need of revitalization and change.

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Before setting sail in 1912, the Titanic’s crew received multiple iceberg warnings from other ships in the area. Despite these messages, the ship maintained its high speed, and the captain did not alter course—and we all know the tragic consequences of ignoring the timely and wise warnings.

In a similar way, Jesus lamented over Jerusalem because they refused to listen:

“Jerusalem, Jerusalem, you who kill the prophets and stone those sent to you, how often I have longed to gather your children together, as a hen gathers her chicks under her wings, and you were not willing. Look, your house is left to you desolate.”

(Luke 13:34-35a)

They refused to change course when destruction was on the horizon. They were headed towards an iceberg, about to shipwreck themselves, but they refused to listen and instead kept plowing full steam ahead. This grieved Jesus.

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Walking Out of the Wilderness Alive

March 18, 2025

4 Min Read

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Driven by a desire for adventure, freedom, and a rejection of societal norms, Chris McCandless graduated college, gave away his savings, abandoned his possessions, and set off on a journey across the U.S. Ultimately his solo journey led him to live off the land deep in the Alaskan wilderness. While the exact details of his death have been speculated and argued about for decades, what is clear is that he eventually died of starvation after consuming toxic wild plants that slowly poisoned and paralyzed him, rendering him unable to hunt or forage.

If McCandless had been able to define the danger, he would have walked out of the Alaskan wilderness alive.

Over the past ten years or so, the phrase “spiritual abuse” has come more into the common vernacular. It has become a more well-known topic, but that doesn’t mean that we’re actually talking about it. Or that we even know what we’re talking about when we do.

And that includes me. I’ve still got a lot to learn.

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