So don’t even try. What we need are more Christians—visible leaders or otherwise—who are content to whisper. Who have earned the honor of being listened to by sowing years and years of steady faithfulness and trustworthiness.

“Grant me joy and peace as I humbly trust You with the outcome of my life and ministry.”

I’ve been praying that over myself for what must be something like 6 years now. Maybe more. That’s  well over 2,000 times at least. Like any prayer, there is a cumulative effect that is only experienced in repetition over a long period of time. Here are three things I notice that it’s forming in me.

Jesus never asked his disciples to do the strategic thing; he asked them to do the obedient.

You simply sit there with him. In the dark. In the unknowing. In the awkwardness. For however long it lasts.

The other option is running out into the light. Where you can see clearly. Where everything is familiar. Where life is just as you are used to it being.

In body. That’s why it’s important to eat well. All the time. One healthy meal in the midst of an unhealthy diet won’t do you much good. The benefits of exercise are cumulative, not a one-time fix. It’s why we have doctors that we go to for regular checkups, or when something in our body is in pain or not functioning properly. We never arrive at a place where our bodies are 100% healthy.

Not an inner experience that you can manipulate yourself into having.

Joy isn’t primarily something that you do to yourself, but something that is done to you. Joy is an internal reaction to some sort of outside, external stimulus. Joy is an effect, not a cause.

Joy often eludes you when you try to go directly it it.

You don’t have enough time.

You don’t have enough money.

You don’t have enough energy.

You don’t have enough resources.

“Very truly I tell you, you will see ‘heaven open, and the angels of God ascending and descending on’ the Son of Man.”

John 1:51

This was Jesus’ premise to skeptical Nathanael. A bit of a strange thing to say on the face of it. Unless, of course, (like Nathanael probably was), you’re familiar with the story of Jacob’s wild dream:

A staircase. Stretching from the earth up into the heavens. Angels going up and down, back and forth between heaven and earth. And then God himself standing at the top, promising to multiply Jacob’s descendents beyond measure. (You can read the whole dream in Genesis 28).

It’s all about heaven and earth being intimately connected, about a God’s blessings pouring out over the entire earth.

But smaller is not better either.

Bigger is not harder to bear than small. Each requires a different strategy to bear it well.

Bigger can be unsustainable. Smaller can also be unsustainable. Thankfully, both can also be sustainable.

Because sin is not a private problem. Sin is a communal problem, so we need a communal solution.

Because salvation isn’t done in secret. Salvation is a public event, drawing the attention of those still held captive so that they too can call on Jesus.

Because when our story is graciously intersected and interrupted by Jesus, that story simply must be told to someone. Anyone who might listen.